Back to Reality

We still had a few hours before we were supposed to leave Charleston, and my friends and I were trying to soak up all that we could of the city. We were strolling through one of the beautiful downtown neighborhoods, when I realized that I hadn't heard from my family in a while...

I called home and my husband informed me in a very grave voice that he had some good news and some bad news for me... and my heart stopped.

"That maker tip our son bit off and you thought he swallowed... Well, we found it on the floor."

"Okay. What's the bad news? What happened?" I fretfully asked as my throat tightened.

So I hadn't realized that toddlers especially like bitting the tips off of markers until my son did it last week. It was a Crayola marker- washable and "nontoxic", but I still called Poison Control. They told me there was absolutely nothing to worry about unless he had an allergic reaction. He seemed fine at the time and I completely forgot about it until my husband mentioned it over the phone.

He paused for effect and I yelled, "Tell me the bad news, NOW" .

In the faction of a window of a second that it took for my husband to respond, this is was was racing through my mind?

What if the marker irritated the lining of his tiny stomach and he was having cramps? What if he fell and hit his head? Can toddlers get concussions? Maybe he had a seizure? I just heard about really young kids having unexplained seizures. My sister used to have seizures. What if it's genetic? Did he break his arm? his leg? his spine? Maybe he had an allergic reaction to something else and they were racing to the hospital. Were they in a car accident on the way? Did he choke on a grape? I warned everyone to cut them in half! Cut the stupid grapes in half! OMG! OMG! OMG!

My husband took a deep breath and said, "Our son ripped all the paper off a green crayon..."

"AND?!!!"

"Nothing. That's it. I thought you'd get a kick out off that."

"Do NOT tell me you have 'bad news' about MY son while I am HUNDREDS of miles away from him and have it be something that RETARDED."

"Oh, I just thought you'd laugh. It's pretty funny."

"No, that's just a day in the life, man. You had me thinking he was in the hospital, or in a cast, or something. You SCARED me!!!"

"oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..."

"I can't even talk to you right now."

As I hung up on him, all of my overprotective mommy feelings came back in a flood and suddenly I missed my family more than I loved this charming place and this dreamy time away from it all. In being transported to a new place, I managed to recapture an old frame of mind- the liveliness of my (long forgotten) bachelorette days...

The past few days were all about hanging out with the girls, getting dressed up and going out every night, sipping cocktails in toppley glassware, eating in restaurants that didn't have highchairs, and shopping without rushing to get home in time for naps. One by one, each of my cares melted away and I no longer worried about how a new purchase would fit into the household budget, but rather when I'd get to wear it out... again.

In Charleston, I wasn't someone's wife or mommy. No one complimented me on "how well my son ate his veggies", only on my cute shoes. I was just me.

My mind snapped back to reality quickly after that phone call. My reality. I may have stolen some time to laugh, sip wine, and relax with my girlfriends, but I'm not carefree anymore. Not really. I am a wife and a mom. I plan. I worry. I nurture. I worry. I care. I worry.

My flight didn't depart for another two hours, but that's when my vacation actually ended.

Driving over the Ashley River at sunset. Just breathtaking and a little bittersweet. Bye-bye, Charleston