Just a Mom Milestone

Tomorrow is the first anniversary of the day I "officially" became a SAHM.

A year ago, I swiped my security badge for the very last time and with great trepidation, handed it over to the guard on duty. Even though I had resigned months before and at that point, had only hung on until the next sucker my replacement could be hired and sufficiently trained, I remember thinking, "Oh crap, what have I done?"

What I had done was walk away from a world where I felt smart, ambitious, and IMPORTANT... Like a lot of people, my whole identity was wrapped up in my career. It was, after all, everything I had been working towards up until this point. Without it, what was I?

By the way, it bears mentioning that Piper of Love wrote a clever post about this very thing last week. Her words struck a nerve with me, reminding me of exactly how I felt about this huge life change... and quite timely, no less.

What I dreaded most was losing myself in the stereotype of the suburban housewife. I am, of course, referring to the "me" whose passions, interests, intellect, and clever wit would now be reduced to three words: "just a mom".

Well, it turns out "just a mom" is exactly what I want to be and my son... well, he's only the most fascinating creature in the world!

I love that our days are filled with wonder and discovery and if he wakes up and decides that he most certainly does NOT want to wear pants today... well, he doesn't have to and we just don't leave the house. I love it when he beams at me from across the dinner table after we've just shared an inside joke and that he can't fall sleep until I kiss him goodnight. I love it when he laughs and even when he cries, because it means I can comfort him in my arms.

Sure, I still miss my old job now and again, especially as my son approaches the "terrible twos" with a fury. I've broken down and sobbed in frustration, fantasied about "this being daycare's problem right now", and even updated my resume (you know, just in case)... but overall, being my son's mom is the best job ever. I enjoy it so much that I would even do it if they didn't pay me... Oh, wait...

I thought that I would look upon this anniversary with more melancholy and despair, but actually... I'm really okay with it. I'm really, 100%, no-takesies-backsies OKAY with it. Yeah, I'm shocked, too.

Making the transition from pouring over monthly performance stats to pouring over books called Parenting with Love and Logic and The Happiest Toddler on the Block (just to name a few) hasn't always been smooth, but I'm just so grateful to make it to this milestone with the confidence that I made the right choice all along.

Sadly, there will be no diamond journey pendants or even a chocolate cake to mark the occasion, although I do have a blogiversary coming up. Feel free to send gifts and flowers to... haha!

Just kidding.