A few weeks ago, my best friend sent me an update from our 10 year high school reunion...
I was a little surprised she went since she's the one who suggested that we completely blow off the five reunion, but then again... who really cares about the five year reunion?
We were still in school at the time (grad school, but still school), working at so-so jobs, unmarried, and childless. Other than living on our own instead of with our parents, not much had really changed since high school.
Ten years is a little different though. You would hope that a lot has changed. Being closer to 30 than 13, you would especially hope that people would have grown up and gotten over... well, all that high school crap.
I would have been interested to see what became of everyone. (Just not interested enough to remember where I put my invitation...)
I laughed out loud as I read who had married whom, who got really, REALLY fat, who was still a snobby bitch (as if I didn't already know), and about my ex-boyfriend, who apparently is...
Still.
Not.
Over.
Me... GAH!
The next few days, the photos, messages, and friend requests started popping up all over Facebook. As all of these people who I used to know reconnected, I started to feel a teensy ounce of regret and wistfulness over missing the reunion...
I noticed a lot of my classmates are married and/or new parents. Most have careers that are taking off or just finishing grad school. It would have been so interesting to hear all of the "how we got here" stories.
Then, I came across the profile of boy who I had the BIGGEST crush on my sophomore year. He just graduated with an MBA from Harvard and he still has not idea I exist... and even though I'm happily married and living a fabulous life in London, that still makes me wilt.
Then, there was the boy who had the biggest crush on me. I knew it and I chose to ignore it... Well, he's a published author now and I can't even keep up with my blog.
There were the kids I used to make fun of, the kids that used to make fun of me, and so forth...
...and just like that, I was transformed into the self-conscious, nervous girl with the dorky glasses and hairy legs because her mom won't let her shave her legs. (Seriously.)
The one that went to junior prom stag, took dance instead of tennis, and worked crew instead of starred in the play because she never got picked for anything... and was lame enough to get upset by it.
Of course, none of that matter now, but as my best friend put it best in her e-mail:
I was a little surprised she went since she's the one who suggested that we completely blow off the five reunion, but then again... who really cares about the five year reunion?
We were still in school at the time (grad school, but still school), working at so-so jobs, unmarried, and childless. Other than living on our own instead of with our parents, not much had really changed since high school.
Ten years is a little different though. You would hope that a lot has changed. Being closer to 30 than 13, you would especially hope that people would have grown up and gotten over... well, all that high school crap.
I would have been interested to see what became of everyone. (Just not interested enough to remember where I put my invitation...)
I laughed out loud as I read who had married whom, who got really, REALLY fat, who was still a snobby bitch (as if I didn't already know), and about my ex-boyfriend, who apparently is...
Still.
Not.
Over.
Me... GAH!
The next few days, the photos, messages, and friend requests started popping up all over Facebook. As all of these people who I used to know reconnected, I started to feel a teensy ounce of regret and wistfulness over missing the reunion...
I noticed a lot of my classmates are married and/or new parents. Most have careers that are taking off or just finishing grad school. It would have been so interesting to hear all of the "how we got here" stories.
Then, I came across the profile of boy who I had the BIGGEST crush on my sophomore year. He just graduated with an MBA from Harvard and he still has not idea I exist... and even though I'm happily married and living a fabulous life in London, that still makes me wilt.
Then, there was the boy who had the biggest crush on me. I knew it and I chose to ignore it... Well, he's a published author now and I can't even keep up with my blog.
There were the kids I used to make fun of, the kids that used to make fun of me, and so forth...
...and just like that, I was transformed into the self-conscious, nervous girl with the dorky glasses and hairy legs because her mom won't let her shave her legs. (Seriously.)
The one that went to junior prom stag, took dance instead of tennis, and worked crew instead of starred in the play because she never got picked for anything... and was lame enough to get upset by it.
Of course, none of that matter now, but as my best friend put it best in her e-mail:
This entire event undermined everything we had worked for and become over the last 10 years in terms of coming to know ourselves and the new self confidence that brings - it turned even me into the nervous high school girl I once was and [my husband] saw the embarrassing and awful regression as soon as I walked in.I guess I'm glad I missed it after all.
7 comments:
hmmm, that is just about how i felt about my 10th reunion. only, everyone was NOT over all the old petty crap. Not going to 20th.
I skipped the whole 5 and 10 year reunions for all the reasons you mentioned.
However, my 15th reunion was actually a lot of fun...and not just because my sister married our favorite teacher from high school and sort of "came out" with their relationship at my reunion. That was just a bonus.
I think you can make the reunion whatever you want...if you want to rise above the highschoolness and just be nice to everyone, you can lead by example. At my 15th, so many of us were in the same boat with parenting, it gave us plenty to talk about and put us on the same page.
AH! I have my 10th coming up soon. I missed the 5th for the same reason you did.
I am not sure if I am going: I know I'll turn back into that same scared HS girl.
BTW: I did the same play crew, non-school athletics, nothing in the spotlight.
oh, funny enough, the guy who made my HS experience miserable by making fun of me when he remembered I was around (see: why I stayed out of the spotlight)...just friended me on facebook. I was shocked to say the least.
omygoodness...that is so the truth. Whenever I meet up with people that I went to highschool with I revert right back to the person I was, even though the person NOW is a much better version. so strange.
My ten year is in a couple of weeks and while I want to go to see if anyone I've lost touch with is there, I don't want to go for the very reasons you've already mentioned.
I did however attend the reunion for the class ahead of me and that was a good time...but then again, most of the people I hung out with were in THAT class!
My 10 year was two years ago. Nobody really changed. It was a waste. I felt old and married and they were ALL doctors and lawyers (all girls school) and PhDs. I felt underwhelming. You didn't miss anything. And, they are all on Facebook and wanting to befriend me. If we aren't "Friends" I don't get why we should be friends.
High School does not leave me with wonderful memories. When I attended high school the girls were awful bitches. Now i live far away from them and am only too happy. I have a wonderful husband, 2 fantastic children and the best friends ever. I wouldn't change it for the world or ever want to re-live the not such wonderful high school memories.
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