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Married a geek, then left a job in advertising to be a personal assistant to a toddler. The pay is... well, nonexistent, but the perks are simply priceless.

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Showing posts with label Religion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Religion. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Elephants, Peanuts, and Buried Saints

Our house was a total wreck for the showings over the holiday weekend. It was our last weekend to pack and with so much of it left to do, we just kept at it, as agent after agent strolled through with buyers.

My in-laws were in town helping us as well, and my mother-in-law instituted a maddening, but effective system of emptying every drawer and cupboard onto the counters, then packing everything all at once. Previously, we were trying to be neat and just pack one little area at at time, which was NOT working...

So with everything we own not only OUT, but also covering every surface, each couple had to step over our boxes and piles of packing peanuts to "admire" the house. I say (air quotes) admire, because the feedback that was given to our agent and passed along to us was not good...

Until this weekend, we hardly got any feedback. Mostly that "the house was nice and showed well, but the buyers were still looking". This time, we got "the house is too small and dark", "hated the neighborhood", or "hated the built-ins and other decorative upgrades"...

I know I shouldn't obsess over the random comments of random strangers who lack imagination, but I've been bitter about it ever since. Obviously, circumstances were not ideal, but again, it's hard not to take this sort of stuff personally.

However, I'm not sure what is the "best circumstance" when it comes to selling a house, but you better believe that everyone has an opinion on the matter... and is dying to share it with me.

My mother-in-law insists that a properly staged home sells the quickest. On the other hand, I have friends who insist that an empty house allows buyers to better visualize their stuff in each room. More importantly, buyers avoid getting distracted by something you own and plan to take with you and has nothing to do with the house itself...

I tend to agree with that latter advice. When we were house hunting, we walked into a home where the owners were obsessed with elephants. Uhhhb-sessed! There were tables, chairs, and planters shaped like elephants. They had elephant throw pillows, elephant artwork, soap carved into teeny tiny elephants, and even two large plush elephants posed as if they were kissing...

Hubby and I (and even our real estate agent) got so caught up in making fun of them, that we totally didn't take the house seriously... AT ALL.

There was also the time when we walked into a house where the owners had just cooked bacon. I'm sure the house could have been aired out and been fine, but it just smelled (and thereby looked) entirely too greasy and gross to us that we never even looked at the house. The smell was so overpowering that we simply turned around and walked out immediately.

Our house does not smell like bacon.

One person who recently sold a house in one of the priciest and worst housing markets in the country told me that buyers really go for perfectly aligned vacuum tracks on carpet. I guess I know I'll be doing every other day until my son and I leave to London...

Of course, there is also the myth/urban legend about burying a saint in your front yard, which all of my Catholic friends swear by. Being a practicing Catholic myself, I did a little research on the matter (Google) and discovered that there's a whole spell-casting, candle-burning, dousing of magic oils aspect to it, as well...

I even found a "St. Joseph House Selling Kit" on Amazon for $19.95. Oh, baby! Yeah!

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Lent and Other Forms of Penance...

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday and the question of the day was...

What are you giving up for Lent?

In the past, I've tried doing something more for Lent, rather than giving something up. Avoiding soda just doesn't seem to have the same impact as being more charitable or letting go of anger...

One year, I gave up ragging on my roommates. At the time, I lived with three other girls in a tiny college apartment. Things would get pretty catty, so that Lent I decided to do my part to stop it.

Surprise. Surprise. Things got easier to deal with when I stopped taking everything so personally or cataloging every misdeed to anyone that would listen... To this day, we are all still friends and I learned an important lesson about being more easy-going.

Well this year, I am giving up the sauce, people. I mean it. Stop laughing.

Wine. Martinis. I never really cared much for beer, but I'm giving that up too. I'm shelving it all 'til Easter. I'm not even going to "cheating" on Sundays.

Why?

No reason in particular. I just thought it would be a good idea to practice some moderation in my life. To be around something and not automatically consume it in large quantities. Why not start with the booze?

Oh beautiful, sanity- restorative drug of choice.

On that note, it's probably not a bad idea to use this time to find other ways to detox (so to speak) at the end of a stressful day...

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As for my other form of penance.... I signed up for fitness boot camp earlier this week. That New Year's resolution of getting fit in '08...

Yeah well, I was going strong for the first two weeks of the year. Weak Abs are so '07 and all. By Week Three, I started to fizzle. I would go the gym to attend classes, but not much else. I guess I set my standards too low by "just showing up". I wasn't pushing myself and started missing classes to sleep in... staying up way too late... eating lots of crappy stuff... Basically, back to my old habits, again.

One of my friends suggested hiring a personal trainer together and splitting the cost, so I looking into it, getting jazzed once more. Unfortunately, she and I couldn't make a time work for both of us, but the trainer told me about this boot camp starting in two days...

It's TWELVE weeks of 6 am workouts, 5 days a week with a former Army drill sergeant. Yeah, I was intimidated, too, but my lame-o trips to the gym were starting to be a waste of time. I need a kick in the pants. I need someone to tell me what to do and hold me accountable. I need to lose 40 pounds.

So here I am again. Today is Day Three. I'm sore. I'm tired. I want to die. I think that's a good sign.

Oh, and the drill sergeant. HOTNESS. That's not bad either.