Here, you'll need this latte...

While we were in college, a friend and fellow classmate of mine decided that being a barista was more fun than being a chemistry major and dropped out of school. Really, who can blame him?

I was completely supportive since it meant free, no-strings attached caramel soy lattes every single day just for hanging out with him or dropping by between classes.

He was a smart guy (hence majoring in chemistry...) and ambitious in his own way (in spite of the dropping out...), so it didn't take long for him to be promoted to shift lead, then store manager. His work hours were typical of those of the service industry, which is to say unusual and random at best. In the meantime, I graduated and joined the 9-to-5 corporate world.

He would call me at work in the middle of the week to ask if I had the afternoon off, "'cuz we needed a fourth for golf and everyone else is working". I found it rather amusing that he would actually be disappointed/surprised when I said, "umm, no" and "yeah, imagine that..."

He was good for a laugh, until COFFEE took over his life... Over happy hour, he would regale us with long and tedious work stories that ended with zingers like "...and so we gave him DECAF instead!" or "... and we gave her FAIR TRADE, instead of Christmas Blend and she never even noticed!"

The rest of us, on the edge of nodding off, would smile or give a courtesy laugh, then change the subject immediately. As the stories grew longer our attention span got shorter and we decided to STOP inviting him out with us- free lattes or not. No one likes a boring story teller.

Oh yeah, and it was about this time that he also started spreading vicious rumors about me... but, that's a story for another day.

Lately, whenever I step out of my "SAHM world" of playdates, Gymboree, and train exhibits, I feel a little karma sneaking up on me. I see the way single folks and childless couples roll their eyes or exchange meaningful glances when I start telling a story about "what my son did at play group on Friday..." or that "cute thing he did right before we left the house..." Suddenly, I feel like the boring one and they're the ones looking for an exit or trying to change the subject.

While I'm not shy about the fact that I have a child, it's not as if I only talk about my child. I mean, I watch my fair share of TV. I read books and travel. I enjoy brunch and don't even mind being the one to cook it. I'm a great listener and I'd love to hear all about you, too, but as soon as I mention anything about my day as a mom that STAYS HOME (gasp!), I can all but feel the brand being burned into my side.

Oh, she's one of those MOMS.... those boooooooring moms that talks about her KID! Ewww....

Usually, I could care less about what other people think of me, but it so happens that I will be attending a wedding in a few weeks. It's another friend from college that's getting married (one that didn't drop out to be a barista)... and many of my old drinking buddies, ex-roommates, and classmates will surely be there, too.

I've been catching up on my current events, gossip, and pop culture trivia in anticipation, but I'm sure all they'll want to talk about is what I've been doing with my MBA lately. Yeah, about that...

Or, that time when we all got so drunk and...

Oops! Well, I guess that's also another story for another time, too... Ahem. Ahem. Ahem.