Grass Greener?

Yesterday, my sister-in-law called to "check up on us". She had heard the news about Hubby losing his job, but I'm not sure if she was calling to commiserate or rub in it...

I filled her in on the basics, but after the hundredth time of repeating them, I just didn't have the heart to go over the details. I also left out most of the big parts like...

... finding out the unemployment benefits that we were naively counting on to see us through because everyone we knew said would be so freakin' awesome (like "70% of Hubby's previous salary" awesome) will barely cover groceries for a week. That's NOT 70%... Boo! Hiss! Texas.

On top of that, they get still get taxed... federally. Um, Insult, meet Injury.

... finding out that the toothache that I thought was merely stress-related is actually my wisdom teeth coming in about 10 years too late and a week before we lose all of our health insurance.

No, we can't even afford COBRA (see above). At least, the dentist prescribed some beautiful painkillers until they can be removed.

Of course, once I took one of the beautiful painkillers and was lying in bed happily stress-free, my husband comes in to tell me that our son spiked a fever. Again, no health insurance in a week, but at least for this one, I can call my mom.

Basically, all of the parts that I don't really care to discuss with anyone right now, so I casually changed the subject and asked how they were doing... big mistake.

My brother-in-law (Hubby's youngest brother) has just accepted a wonderful new job. It's a great opportunity that pays double the salary and apparently offers endless growth. She'll get to stay home with the kids like she claims to have always wanted. However, it also means that they will have to move.

Yeah, moving sucks, but you would think that this would still be really, really exciting for her...

Nope. Not her.

After throwing a big hairy hiss about having to move... wait for it, wait for it... a messily hour away for this fabulous, lucrative job, she told me that she only conceded after he PROMISED that they never... ever...move... again.

She also gloated informed me that his salary was only "going to get better year after year" (i.e. they never have to worry about money again) and they fully expect to get three times what they paid for their house in selling it.

In light of our current circumstances, it's difficult NOT to be jealous hearing all this... even if that last part was just plain petty and hurtful.

I didn't feel the need to disclose to her our highly tentative plans of moving wherever Hubby's next career move lands us, whether it be across the country and across the globe....

Knowing how she reacted to moving across their home state of Oklahoma, I didn't really think she would be very supportive anyhow.

That, and quite frankly, I had had enough of talking to her.

My sister-in-law isn't entirely short-sighted, self-centered, and insensitive. She did offer me some words of comfort... I think.

"At least I only have the ONE kid... ", she told me, whatever the hell that was supposed to mean...

122 Minutes

...that I will never ever get back. EVER.

This past weekend I was in the mood for a stupid movie and low and behold, look what the Netflix fairy doth brought me!
It certainly wasn't the worst movie that I've seen in a while. It had its moments (they were all in the previews) and just about every tired stereotype about Southerns and the French you could possibly imagine. Yet, surprisingly no mocking whatsoever of NASCAR (or its fantics). Now, THAT was disappointing.

Just like its cars and its tracks and its drivers and just about anything having whored itself to NASCAR, the entire movie was a messy blur of blatant product placements. Here, I'll save you the trouble of watching it...

Applebee'sDominosTacoBellWonderBreadOldSpicePerrierPoweradeMountainDewCoca
ColaCountryCrockCheckersDrive-inRestaurantsTideM&MsKFCSprintNextelBudweiser
NASCAR NASCAR NASCAR

Did ya get all that?

At least, I can say this for Talladega Nights. It was better than Cars.

Toys R Us Employees are Automitrons

I've never liked Toys R'Us (yes, even as a kid). It's disorganized, dirty, and overpriced, but every parent finds themselves compelled to go there for one reason or another. It's inevitable.

Today, I was in search of an elusive toy that I'm been unlucky finding anywhere else. It wasn't there either, but I decided to make the most of my trip and get some other things I need to pick up anyway.

When I arrived at the check out counter, purchases in hand, I was completely ignored by the three employees goofing off in front of the cash register. As soon as, I called attention to the fact that I am indeed ready and waiting to pay for my stuff now, all but one of them fled.

Instead of a "hi", I received a very rehearsed "Would you like to pick up some batteries to accompany your purchase today?" from the one employee that remained.

"No, thank you. I don't need them," I replied as I was sorting out the random stuff my son grabbed off the shelves and insisted went in the cart.

As I handed her the stuff to be put back, she asked again, "Are you sure you don't need any batteries?"

"No, thanks. I don't," I said as I dashed to pick up the greeting cards my son decided to empty from the display.

Obviously trained to press the issue, she asked a third time before I ran my card, "Would you like me to get you some batteries to go with this?"

"What did I say when you asked me the first two times? No. No, I do not need batteries. Thank you. Stop asking."

So, what did I purchase than the cashier thought I would so desperately need to power up ASAP?

Three greeting cards and a PURSE!

Not an electronic purse.

Not an iPurse from the future.

Not a Decepticon taking the form of a purse.

No flashing light.

No sounds.

No batteries needed.

Just a simple little cloth pretend purse and some pretend accessories to be given as a birthday gift to a little girl we know. (The cell phone included is fake and also does not require batteries. Not even a pretend charger)

PUSHER!

Your Toddler May Be a Terroist...

I caught a glimpse of this story on CNN while I was having lunch the other day, but didn't get to "investigate" until now....

Depending on whose story you believe... a mom (a former Secret Service agent, no less) and her toddler gets detained over water in a the kid's SIPPY CUP. The kid starts to wander off, the mom chases after, and the water falls to the ground...

There's some debate over whether the water was "accidentally spilled" or "dumped" on the floor. Either way, the mom stayed to clean it up and missed her flight and we add yet ANOTHER shining example of how ridiculous and inefficient the TSA truly is.

As if that stupid no-fly list, on which can be found my non-terrorist, All-American, white-bread husband and father-in-law's names, wasn't enough... Sufficed to say, the extra security clearances and detentions required makes traveling with either of them is very un-fun.

I would LOVE nothing more than to go on a summer vacation with my son and husband, but I don't think it's worth the hassle...

BRAVO, dumb asses.

photo by chizziewhizzie